Saturday, May 23, 2009

Gallery Sitting & My Master Plan


Finally! My master plan is actually in effect.

The minute I was told I had Leukemia, I made a list of all the things in my life that needed to be taken care of. Later I was told it would take at least a year post transplant to get back to work. At the time, a year seemed absolutely huge and heartbreaking. Instead of worrying I immediately made a plan to get back into the art world and then back to work. First, when I was well enough, I was going to start volunteering at an art gallery on my own schedule until I was able to do actual shifts again at my job, which they said they were holding for me.

Less than a year passed and then the post transplant complications kept rolling in, one after the other, after the other. I kept telling myself, just a few more months, jut a couple more. After the third year was in sight I began doubting myself a lot. I've been rolling in a whole lot of hurt, mental emotional and physical. All I need is for my body to cooperate a little more.

Eventually I've begun to feel like maybe I won't get back. Losing your future is a hard thing to process and deal with. Especially when you're 36. I'd cry if my tear ducts worked. Damned stem cell insubordination.

But now that the warm weather is here it feels like a small miracle that my hands are working without much trouble. The cold makes them seize up and I spill my drinks on myself and drop things randomly. It's insanely embarrassing for someone who uses their hands for a living.

So I finally get to put my old plan in motion. Here I am at the gallery!

I'm so excited that I was able to do this. I need a huge injection of hope right now.

11 comments:

Autonomous Artisans said...

You look amazing in that photo! Yay you for hanging on in there. Plans change, evolve and adapt as the years go by but holding true to the basic dreams and following them through is just such a rush. Keep on getting stronger and keep on building on those plans and dreams!

Jon and I are rooting for you... now if Jon were here now and had seen me use the word "rooting" he would be giggling like a little boy would at hearing the word "willy"... hehehe.

Much love winging it's way over from Wales! *Mwah*

Caroline said...

How cool! Two years out for me I am finally able to work more than 10-15 hours/week and am adding a second part time job - starting Tuesday. Damn these stupid health issues that keep rolling in!

Anonymous said...

I can see clearly that Gallerys are the right place for you. Keep it up.

P.S. - Der VfL Wolfsburg ist deutscher Meister. Hurra!


Jens.

BaldyLocks said...

Horray for getting back to work Caroline!

I must say, it was only one 5 hour shift but I'm pretty proud!

Neil Wiernik said...

thats awesome Rose!!!!!! Im so happy for you!!! one step at a time, baby steps are good... and please never be embarrassed folks like us have been through more then most have been in a life time we have earned the right to spill a little bit of coffee or tea on our self's with out other people judging us!!! just remember you ROCK!!!!!!!!!!! as I think you certainly do :)

Charlotte said...

Fantastic news!

***Happy new job***

I'm so glad things finally seem to be looking up for you now!

More love winging its way to you from sunny Wales!!! :-)

Charlotte xxxx

Lauren said...

fantastic! congratulations! so glad to hear things are perking up, you are having adventures, and feeling not too shabby. also, love the puppy pictures in the previous post.

xoxo
L

hockeychic said...

This is awesome! Hurray!

lucy said...

It's great that you managed to find a place for yourself in an art gallery! keep on being positive!! good luck!

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