Taking care of yourself is such hard work. Yesterday I felt I was in a semi state of emotional crisis. While at my cry baby induced Waa session at the Cancer Agency the counselor asked an important question. What am I doing for myself?
Um.
So my complete lack of an answer pushed me to make an appointment for my first haircut and a massage. I went today. I would love to tell you I'm orgasmicly happy but I'm not quite sure I am.
The massage was amazing but I'm not sure what kind of miracles I thought the stylist would perform. She's not a head shrinker so my fear of looking like a curly Mr Pumpkin head indeed became a reality.
I did decide that now I am able, I am going to do one thing for myself a day plus a walk. I'm hoping that will be exercise at least 3 times a week, one massage and ? I don't really know what I want. Maybe I'm just tired?
I added a bunch of before and after photos of my hair adventure but deleted them. Sorry. I'm just not ready to go there yet.
I think I'll stick with my blue wig.
On a side rant who would have known that my laid back, friendly to everyone brother, would have such feisty cells? Why can't we just all get along? If they did then I wouldn't need all this medication and I would feel better.
I guess I can't complain. His cells are kicking the cancers ass. Sending out cosmic thankfulness for the gift of life. "Thanks, feisty little cells."
(PS. pleeease stop bullying my liver)
7 comments:
Hun, you are not alone in the weird hair cut team. I went to the hairdressers and didn't know what I wanted, only that I wanted a change, so I let the hairdresser have free reign. I went from someone with hair half way down my back to a weird bob that's shorter at the back than the front and has some layers in it that defy gravity. I look very odd unless I slather it in hair products and spend an hour at it with the hair straighteners. Without straightening it curls in an odd mess that looks like a poodle that had a fight with some hedge trimmers! Yay for odd looking hair do's!
While going through treatment I would get the urge to get my hair cut. I didn't have one hair on my head at the time, so finally when my hair started growing back I ran to the salon to get the hair trimmed up on the back of my neck. People were looking at me as if I had lost my mind.
I hope you start feeling better soon.
I used to shave my head when any scraggly ones tried growing. I can't tell you how tempted I've been to shave it again.
I know I would regret that impulse!
When I had my bike accident several years ago the doctors had to shave one side of my head to stitch me up. I'd had a cute little mop of hair before, but after I just looked ridiculous. So I went to a barbershop and got my hair buzzed and bleached a la Annie Lennox, 1987. It felt bizarre.
Good for you for deciding on one thing per day for yourself. I recommend baths (maybe because I don't have a tub, they seem so enticing).
Hey girlie,
I remember not so long ago when Bobby would actually have to ask me thinks like: "So, do you want me to wash those pajamas for you sometime?" It's just so hard to "take care of yourself" when all you ever do is try to take care of yourself.
Good for you for taking that step. But if you ever need to grunge around, just know there's a lot of out of us out here that understand that.
You're in my thoughts!
MM
Hey... You deserve a cookie.
Or, I'll just tag you... It's silly and kind of fun... You deserve a cookie and some fun! But need some silly... So check my blog and do as I did.
Smoochies!
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