Saturday, April 26, 2008

Broken


I finally changed my profile photo to Missy Blue!

I also finally got the nerve to post up my video. It is a self portrait of the changing landscape of my face. Cancer causes vanity. I was never much into my looks and didn't even mind when I lost my hair. Now I feel I've lost myself. I have documented, through photos, what the cancer and drugs has done to my body. I crave to look like myself again.

9 comments:

Autonomous Artisans said...

I remember my dad telling me that sometimes his own hands startled him because he would be doing something and then see the backs of his hands and he would get this flash of "wow! Who's hands are they" and then a milliseconds later he would realise they were his. He said it was due to how old they looked, when in his minds self image he still had the hands of a 30 year old man.

I guess as our bodies change (and everyone's does) we can either choose to not look at them and keep that mental image of how we were, or we can look, accept and love ourselves the way we are now.

That picture montage is great. It shows just how much you have changed, yet stayed the same. I think it's your eyes. They have a look of mischief going on in pretty much all of the photos. They also document how far you have come on a very difficult journey.

Rosebud Collection said...

I don't think there is anyone that isn't touched by cancer.My mother/my father and worst of all my godson who was only three..
The pictures were something else..

High Desert Diva said...

Prednisone...totally understand your love/hate relationship.

Very moving and excellent choice of music.

I'll ninja yo ass...ha!

Kelly Kane said...

How beautiful my dear. It's a great documentation of your journey, it's so scary what this beast does to a girl and her ego... you're still beautiful my dear.

Hope you're well, miss you! :)

XO!

Jenney said...

Powerful, poetic and beautifully done... your video brings back memories of watching my own loved ones battle cancer. Stay strong. You are an inspiration.

Wonderfully Sew Knit said...

Wow, thanks you so much for sharing your photo journey.

jessicajane said...

Wow, great documentation video. You are beautiful.

BaldyLocks said...

Thanks JessicaJane

T.Allen-Mercado said...

moving,brilliant video...the look in your eyes; each frame, each shot is pure intensity...so much passion there. your spirit and ever changing face are remarkably beautiful...