Saturday, June 6, 2009
I've gone 573 kilometers today. I just kept driving and driving and driving with the last 3 years rolling around in my head. It feels like such a relief to be heading towards somewhere else.
I cheated on the photo, though, that's from my Monday's neurologist appointment. They drew on me with a pen and zapped me repeatedly to test my nerves to see if I have neuropathy from my chemo. No big deal really, I'm just SICK of Dr.s appointments. Unfortunately them's the ropes and I don't know when they'll back off.
This trip feels like a therapeutic adventure. I'm okay, everything is okay but yikes, I need a mental/physical break.
I think I'm mostly good but I have a lot of fear. When cancer pops up it shoves fear right down your throat whether you want it or not. The fear part is so unwelcome in my life.
I feel like I'm taking my life back by confronting them and even pushing those fears over the edge. I've been quietly freaking out the whole way about where I would sleep tonight. My sleep is a huge problem and it limits what I can do. The big fear is, what happens when I can't function tomorrow and I'm so far from home?
Well, I'm about to find out.
I was going to sleep outside tonight in a campground in my hammock but at the last second when it was getting dark, I put myself into a hotel. I decided being outside alone in a campground on sleeping medications was a bad idea. Maybe I'll get a tattoo instead?
WooHoo! I'm on the run!
Will post whenever I get the chance!