The Flaming Joy of Menopause

I believe I've discovered a renewable untapped energy resource. As I write this I am stripping down to my tank top due to an inner surge of post nuclear powered heat. My head becomes red at random intervals and I must remove my clothing. The slightest amount of emotion or warmth transforms and compounds into an abundance of menopausal energy. A hot shower can leave me with hours and hours of an overactive amount of body heat.

Think of the global implications! If we could harness the power of the thrashing restless nights, let alone the heat, we could lay off our non renewable natural resources. The emotional swings of a few women alone could power a small city. My chemo/menopausal forgetfulness which makes me pace around the house could charge a light bulb, at least!

I've heard a theory that raging into early menopause due to chemotherapy is much more severe then coming into it naturally. Either way the concept is mind boggling. This is supposed to happen at some later point in your life? It seems weird and unnatural to me.

We might as well capitalize on it!


I think I may win the Nobel prize for my ingenuity.