Monday, January 25, 2010

Scared



I'm not out of the woods yet in regards to my recent GVHD relapse. I swear the doctor appointments never go away. I get my blood taken every two weeks without fail. The photo above is a couple of weeks ago when they couldn't get enough blood from the first hand so they did the other. Every time I go it seems there is someone new, who I haven't had before and I say the same lame joke every time. I ask them to take it out of my hands because my arms are scarring and I don't want to look like a heroin addict, ha ha. Usually that comment is received by the sound of crickets. I think someone laughed once so I don't know why I say it every time.

They always tell me getting it out of my hand hurts a lot and am I sure I want them to do it there? I feel like saying, "HELLO! I had 5 bone marrow biopsies, I laugh at your wimpy little needle!"

Anyway, I'm beating around the bush, the doctors office just called again. My blood is still not right and now my white count is elevated which sends off alarm bells. There are no blasts, which are the cells that mean cancer is back. But still, extra white cells without an illness that I'm fighting off can be bad news. They asked if I am sick at all which could account for the high white cell count but I'm not.

They want me to see my oncologist but all the appointments have been canceled because of THE OLYMPICS. Yes, the Olympics seem to somehow be a valid reason for canceling all doctors appointments in Vancouver. I've had another appointment canceled as well.

So now instead of going for a walk in the rare, beautiful sunshine, I'm sitting here waiting for my GP's office to call back. This sucks.

And the Olympics suck too.

Update: I feel fine but my GP is convinced I'm sick or infected in some way. I'm supposed to get to my oncologist if I have a fever, swelling, puss or any sickness of any sort. They also said that I may just not be well yet from the H1N1 even though it's been almost 3 months. They told me to take it easy.

15 comments:

KirstenNotKristen said...

Oooooh my god. Seriously? Cancelled? This is not acceptable and, sadly, not the first I have heard of it. I have scans/appts/treatment scheduled right in the middle of this stupid gong show. Nothing has been cancelled. Yet.

Adding insult to injury, I just heard the torch relay is going to be run down my street. T-shirts and signs are at the ready. I figure, what the hell, arrest me, I'm on palliative chemo!

I really hope that something can be figured out soon to get to the bottom of what is causing the WBC issue.

Hang in there.

Nolympics!

:)Kirsten

Amber said...

hang tight. you are a rock star!

TheFrogBag said...

Goodness! I've never been much for watching any sort of sports, but folks make you feel guilty if you say anything bad about the Olympics. Now I can trump them by saying "but one of my favorite bloggesses had much-needed doctors appointments canceled! See, the Olympics do suck!"

Seriously though, take care! Here's hoping that the WBC issue turns out to be nothing serious.

Jens said...

But I am a "hardcore fan" of almost all winter sports. I bought a few weeks ago a full-HD TV (to watch the Olympic Games).
I can hardly wait for the "stupid gong show".

Cancel doctor appointments because of such events? Would not happen here in Germany (I think so).

But in these circumstances, I would rather cancel the "games" (if I had a choice).

Caroline said...

Damn the doctor. Call the idiot and insist on an appointment.

Keith (Butterfly Bay) said...

*hugs* I hope the doctors get their heads out of their asses and accept appointments. health is more important than friggin sports!

I hope you're able to get the WBC issue sorted.

Autonomous Artisans said...

Could you try the "I'm going to camp out in your office until you see me" trick on the Doctor?

That or mail them lots of sweaty trainers, until they have an aversion to the smell of them and thus panic whenever they see a sports person.

Neils Nodes said...

rose ... I know this is scary no denying it ... I hope that it gives you some sense of hope and security knowing that so many people have you in there thoughts and most of all all are screaming NO this is injustice that appointments are canceled for the olympics (the winter olympics non the less). Maybe it is time we all start writing letters to your MPP? Do you know who this is and would you be ok for with your friends and fellow cancer warriors advocating for you?

kyra said...

damn. the olympics are already creating havoc - but that takes the cake wouldn't you say? if i didn't have this nasty cold, i'd come wait for your phonecall with you and bring some cheese sandwiches from the Bean. (rain cheque?)

BaldyLocks said...

KristenNotKirsten- I'm glad to hear your scans and things have not been canceled. I'm not really sure if it's the doctors that are being pressured to close their doors or if the government has shut them down like they did with the surgeries.

I had no reason for disliking the Olympics until they canceled the surgeries, closed Parliament (WTF?), stole the design of our First Nations Cowichan sweaters and then outsourced them to be made in China. I never thought I lived in a Country that would do any of those things. The real topper was having an oncology appointment postponed and another appointment also moved to after the Olympics.

I was perfectly fine with the Olympics until all the bad moves, the Prime Minister and the Olympics committee made.

I also don't think camping out in the doctors offices will help, if they're not there. From what one doctor said, they'll continue working from home during the games. I'm sure everyone in treatment will continue to be looked after. I'm sure the Olympics committee wouldn't want their image tarnished by people dropping dead from their decisions.

I also heard that they were clearing out all homeless people in certain areas. I don't know a lot about that, though.

Jens -Please, please enjoy the Olympics because after all this fuss someone has to enjoy it! I'm sure it will be amazing... if it snows. A lot of things could have been done differently but I hope the games don't suffer for it.

Neil -I appreciate you being willing to go to bat for me but I'm sure my appointments can wait. It's not the best case scenario for sure but my GP is keeping a close eye on me. I may "accidentally" get an extra blood work done this week just to keep on top of it. I usually go every two weeks.

Truthfully I really don't have a clear idea of what's going on with the doctors and appointments. I only know that my time between appointments was extended until after the games and another appointment that I had was moved until after.

I was told that if there was anything serious, then patients would be 'taken care of'.

BaldyLocks said...

Cowichan sweater issue -I should have made it slightly clearer that the Olympic committee was looking to make Official Olympic sweaters of the First Nations Cowichan design. They then shut out the Cowichan people who are the originators and the only true knitters of the Cowichan sweater, not hiring them to make them. They then took a bid from a company in China, to create them. Imagine, the Official Olympic sweater is a knockoff!

They stole from the local indigenous people. I honestly can scarcely believe it after our terrible history here of DOING JUST THAT.

The Cowichan people fought against it and some sort of compromise was made but I have a very bad taste left from it. Damn. This is making me even angrier.

Thanks for all the love you guys and Amber, you get an A+ because I LOVE being called a RockStar :)

Teddy Started It said...

I know it's not the same as cancer, but after 6 rounds of invitro, I sure can relate to tired used-up veins. No fun! And those humorless techs always think they know better. Guess they've never had to sit on the other side of the needle.

Lauren said...

hi darling! Oh boy, do the Olympics suck for so many reasons now, on top of how they sucked before I read this post. How does that get justified? Anyway. Thinking of you. Because nothing is wrong - your immune system just took a battering this past fall and is taking its own sweet time to recover. X's and O's. -L

Ann said...

It's unbelievable that the GOVERNMENT canceled doctors for a sporting event. I'm in the US and I have no idea how your health system works, but if the government can tell people when to work then there is something wrong with that system.

If this is the type of healthcare they want to get here, that scares me.

BaldyLocks said...

Ann, I wouldn't trade my countries medical system in for anything. There's really no need to be scared, our system is beyond excellent!

Truthfully there is a lot the US medical system could learn from ours. We cover everyone, can see any doctor we want, if we are not happy we can go somewhere else and get the same high quality care. My hospital is one of the best in the world for treating leukeima and for bone marrow transplants and doctors come from all over the world to train in our system.

This Olympic thing is extremely unusual and that's why we are all bitching about it. That's what this country is about, if we don't like the decisions that are being made we will kick some ass and get it changed.

My appointments aren't critical and as KirstenNotKristen stated, all her treatments and appointments are all on schedule.